Saturday, July 31, 2010

Behind The Insecurities.

pic from here
Within these writing is an unconditional love for you... you'll know who you are:

At the moment I'm taking a step back from a lot of things in my life and just trying to sort everything out. I think one saying that still confuses me and is one thing that I've heard most of my life is how smart and beautiful I am but I'm starting to wonder why people don't take full advantage of that. Ill never completely take ones opinion of me too seriously but I often have to re-evaluate myself as a person living in this world. I can say just like most people today would agree that I don't know all the answers to this crazy thing called life. There's many things I don't understand nor will I understand for some time to come. But I do hope that the people in my life can deal with my lack of understanding and accept me full and whole for the person that I showcase to be. I'm sure most of you have read several post from my blog with a not so happy annotation to them and with the fact that this is my personal blog I try to be as personal as I possibly can.Therefore i wont take a bunch of pictures portraying this image as if my life is perfect and that there's never a time when i feel like i just wanna say "fuck my life". Honestly there's so many things that people have to go through and feel that are so unfair and i can say that Ive been crying so much between yesterday and today that crying doesn't seem foreign to me , its like the tears fall out so frequently they've grown a sort of normalcy.It dosnt help that every damn sad song ever made seems to play non stop and that everything reminds of so many funtimes. But at the end of the day there's sometimes nothing you can do, as long as you know that you've tried until you couldn't give anymore. I might not be posting for a couple of days, I feel like within my life problems I've lost myself and I'm the most sad I've been in a while. Hopefully a turn of events will end up in my favor and the life I've experienced for the last two years will present itself again and in change it'll be a much happier life for me.

Thank you lovelies for continuing to read my blog,

amara nichole.

No comments :